Frank Casino Bedroom Thoughts

Will try to keep this short but who knows. I semi sometimes live with my boyfriend and his family as my own home life isn't the greatest. We've been dating for about 6 years I'm a 22F and he 22M. He has told me that all his life he has experienced strange things from time to time examples include having horrible dreams about hell fire and skeletons, seeing full bodied apparitions as a child, and also shadows always lurking in the corner of his bedroom. I could honestly create a whole very long post about everything he's experienced but I'd rather ask about what has been happening more recently. I noticed that about 2 years after me and him had been dating, according to him, the activity had been ramping up and becoming more common than before when he was younger.
I noticed that sometimes his house gives off a creepy vibe but this was hard to detect because honestly the place is decorated and arranged very pleasantly and it's located in a beautiful part of where we live which is somewhere in the PNW. Well, especially in his bedroom is where I noticed the creepiness coming from which we think is also the center of all the activity. Actually, so, the house was built in the 60's (it's a double wide with an extended room built in after if that helps) and there used to be an older couple that lived in his bedroom and one day the wife died from natural causes in his bedroom. For awhile me and my boyfriend had the theory that the activity was being caused by the spirit of this woman who wasn't happy that a teenage/ young adult boy had been living in her room for years, oh yes by the way he has lived in this house all his life. Buuuttt that theory got debunked when his mom brought in a Catholic medium/ psychic over to the house. She said she detected a presence that was actually male, and she didn't want to say if she felt the spirit was human or.. something else, which I find odd, honestly though this women wasn't very helpful.
However I do think she's right, whatever it is it has a "male" presence. I know this because one of really the only times it's ever messed with me personally was about 2 years ago. It was the morning, I didn't have anything going on that particular day so I stayed in my boyfriends bed to sleep in while he got up for work. Eventually him and his dad (the only other 2 people there that morning) went outside to get things ready for their job, they work together doing construction. So to set the scene, I'm laying in his bed somewhere between sleep and awake while him and his dad are outside, in the bedroom there is a window to the outside where they get things ready, it was closed but it allows me to hear them chatting outside sometimes. It's really, really important to note that when they were talking to each other outside their voices sound muffled and distant. Ok so, all of a sudden I hear a voice, INSIDE the room with me it's a deep male voice, and he goes "I used to be great" I kind of starting to get up and look around while still laying in bed. Now I have to say this isn't usually like me, I do kind of get scared easily but, I think because it was the morning and not night time I felt braver, and another weird thing was that.. I didn't even care which is very very strange of me, because I'm always fascinated by evidence of ghosts existing maybe it's because I was so tired on top of it, I'm not sure. Anyways, I don't think it liked that I was ignoring it for one bit because then, I feel as though something has just rushed up to my face like.. whatever this thing was got up in my face while I was laying in bed and said... something else, unfortunately I can't remember :/ but it was still in this guttural scary, deep male voice and they sounded angry and I could even feel cold air being blown into my face like as if you felt the breath of someone on your face if they/re talking really close to your face. So.. once again this is so strange of me, what did I do? I just rolled over and tried to get more sleep.. completely just trying to ignore what was going on, I guess maybe at the time I felt that was my only option.
I eventually did fall asleep after a couple of minutes and when I did, I had the first and hopefully only sleep paralysis dream I've ever had. It was a typical SP set up I wake up to find that the surroundings looked just like the room I'm sleeping in except I can't move. The only different thing was that .. there was a cat on my chest, a calico cat to be specific I only stayed like this for a couple seconds because in my head I was just like fuck this and started to try to sit up and then when I did, my perception of reality started to shake and rattle like, if you were looking at things through the view finder of a camera and then you start shaking the camera .. kind of hard to explain :/ but it just looked like all of my surroundings were starting to fall apart and then the cat on my chest starting to hiss and meow and it swiped at me in the face and then I woke up laying on my back in my boyfriends room, totally normal.
So yeah, other strange things happen like, for a long stretch of months in the summer to be specific, we would hear scratching everywhere in the walls, wasn't always dedicated to one particular wall or room or anything just randomly, whatever room you were in (this especially happened to me in particular) you would just hear scratching, right wherever you were like as if it was trying to be as close to you as possible. I know know, could be just animals living in the walls buuttt in the summer that makes no sense as it can get so incredibly hot in my opinion no animal would want to be living in those walls in the summer, and it would happen at all different times of the day. Another thing is that my boyfriend has 2 dogs and every so often they both freak out and bark at nothing, it also gets particularly scary when I notice that their eyes seem to be looking around at something we can't see.
For example once my boyfriends vizsla was coming over to give me some love, I was sitting in the middle of the floor beckoning her to come over to me, she was exiting out of my boyfriend's parents bedroom and she had to pass by my boyfriends bedroom in order to come over to where I was. His bedroom door was open and as she passed by she looked inside, she had a stuffed animal in her mouth and when she looked over into his room she dropped it and just started starring, she became visibly more agitated and as soon as I said "Sami, what do you see in there?" she started barking like mad like, so aggressive and not like her at all as she's very gentle but protective. Her gaze starts to shift forward, now looking ahead as if whatever she was looking at in the room came up right over to the front of her face she then starts attacking the stuffed animal she dropped on the ground as if it was alive biting at it viciously and snarling at it. Her eyes are crossed in front of her like she's looking directly in front of her face and I could see this look in her eyes like she was starting to get really scared and shakes the stuffed animal around in her mouth violently and then suddenly throws it really far up in the air and against a wall almost hitting the ceiling. I know that dogs throw things around with their mouths sometimes but she had never done anything like that before, and then she came over to me with her head down looking for comfort, it was so strange.
There's three more big things I need to bring up and then I can get into my theories and questions. 1.st about two months ago, and very important to note when I wasn't there, my boyfriend said that he felt something grab his ankle while he was sleeping, this is big because this is the first instance of whatever this is physically touching him. 2nd. about a week ago I had his house all to myself as him and his family went on a little get away at a casino and I stayed at their house to watch their dogs. That night I wasn't in a good mindset at all but was trying to have a good time by myself. I was hearing the scratching again and frankly just being annoyed by it, it was coming from the large pantry in his kitchen and the scratching would get louder every time I would get closer and examine the inside of the pantry. I just tried to get my mind off of it so I brought out my tarot cards ( I know probably wasn't a good idea if I'm trying to avoid activity) but the tarot cards keep my mind busy, it's a hobby I've been working on and developing my skills on for the past 7 months. I started out by arranging them in an arch shape on the table like as if you took the deck and just spread the cards out in a smooth arch all face down. Now, to be honest I partake in the devils lettuce from time to time and this night was no exception as I was not in good spirits so to sum it up it was making my awfully sleepy and it was late and I had to go to work the next day anyway so I just left my tarot cards out like that, no intention behind it whatsoever other than laziness. The next day I come to the table to find that... somehow... a card had been pulled from the arch right into the middle of it. Now you need to listen to me when I say that I DID NOT DO THIS it wasn't a situation where I figured.. well maybe I did pull a card and I forgot or something, NO, I remember being immediately freaked out but also.. excited. I figured, what's next to do other than flip the card over and see what it is.
The card was.. the 5 of cups which, if you do tarot you would know that is probably in the top 5 most negative cards you can get. It is a card that signifies grief, loss and despair and abandonment, typically people get this card when they've experienced a death of a loved one or an intense break up or some other traumatic event. And the thing is that I have experienced all of those things recently. Soo if this situation wasn't coming off as too complicated, let me add that both me and my bf are actually polyamorous so I had been in a relationship while also being with him, and that person dumped me and the situation was frankly awful and I was lied to and I had felt abandoned. On top of that, this summer I experienced the loss of another guy I used to date, he died of an overdose and I'm still grieving him even though we weren't together anymore when he died I still considered him a friend. So about this card, it's strange because when I told people in my life about this they all asked me, did you feel threatened by this card being somehow magically pulled from the deck? And honestly, I didn't because I felt whatever it was was just telling me.. this is you. Now see if it was the death card, then yes I would feel threatened but this felt different like you could say the 5 of cups already represented me, so seeing that wasn't new information. I wondered if possibly the idk.. spirit or whatever of my dead ex had been the one who pulled it but, I don't know the more I think about it the more I feel like a crazy person.
Lastly, this only happened about 2 days ago and is the reason I've come to the internet for some advice. I was out late but planning to arrive back to sleep at my bf house. I noticed he messaged me "where are you??" at about 11:30pm which I thought was odd because he's not very clingy and just in general lets me be me so this made me worry. I wasn't able to get back until 1 am unfortunately. When I come home I find him sleeping in the guest bedroom, he says I'm not sleeping in my bedroom tonight and when I ask why he proceeds to tell me that earlier while he was laying in his bedroom he was watching something on his phone and he was noticing shadows out of the corner of his eye but he tried to ignore it. He then felt like something was on the bed and when he lowered his phone down he full on sees a completely dark figure so like an outline of a large figure that was all black with no details standing on it's knees(?) at the end of his bed looking at him with it's arms outstretched.
Lets just say, this really really bothered me because in my mind this thing is getting braver and bolder and it's behavior is escalating and me and my boyfriend don't want to wait around until.. one of us gets possessed or something!! So let me get into some leads, well just one lead:
So.. the area where both me and my boyfriend live in my opinion is like the skinwalker ranch of the PNW I mean the town we live in inspired the show Twin Peaks and some of the first and much of the third season of that show was filmed here (another hint at where we live). So on top of all of this activity something else I've been noticing is that my boyfriend has a neighbor who very late into the night is always shining really really really bright lights, in fact so bright that people up to 10 miles away can see them, that's how through small town networking I had met a man who also was seeing these strange lights. He's actually like the towns little paranormal investigator and he invited me to do an interview for him to tell him what I saw. This man is older and has been around and knows a lot of history about our town and the area and he's worked very very closely with the native tribe in our town as if you live in the PNW you are almost guaranteed to be living on native land. He had told me during that interview that where my boyfriend lives is said to be an ancient burial ground for noble native people as it's located on the side of a large mountain which they thought of as sacred. He said he's heard of many strange things happened where my boyfriend lives but didn't explicitly say that it could explain what we experience within his home.
This got me to thinking that perhaps this spirit is of a long dead noble indigenous man of high honor, could that explain why he told me "I used to be great." Some people I tell this story to don't think that as they don't think a native spirit wouldn't be malevolent but I'm inclined to think white people who stole your land and now live on top of your grave would maybe make someone like that pretty angry.
And, frankly that's all I have for an explanation. Some questions I have would be, could this possibly be a actual demon? Or a malevolent spirit? Another thing I wonder is that, my boyfriend is always the one mainly seeing and experiencing the activity while sometimes it messes with me in really weird ways, he seems to not like me and stay away from me, why could this be? Because if demons/ bad spirits are attracted to people with trauma and baggage and depression then I should be the target as I have those in spades, while my boyfriend is a relatively happy guy all the time.
Sorry this was actually really really long but please, anyone have any advice at all? And please please don't suggest saging while I have done saging rituals of my own many times I think it's too far gone in this situation and yes we have saged this house about twice now.

I'm a software engineer in Southern California and I was looking to move out recently. I've been doing some research and visiting my buddies in other states I just can't really see why people are leaving. For reference, I bounce back and forth between the LA and San Francisco areas for my work.

The biggest factors people always site are the price of living, traffic, homelessness, taxes, and our politicians.
Price of Living:
The price of living in California is indeed very high. The example that's always given is the price of housing. A decent-3 bedroom home in the suburbs of a major city can go for 500k. I always thought this was crazy, you can buy a mansion for that kind of money in other states.
Then I checked out Arkansas and Texas. Yeah, I can buy a mansion, but my mansion is gonna be half a mile from my neighbor. I'm not gonna have easy access to a big city or recreational spots. Internet is gonna be terrible. And my neighbors are gonna be hopped up on opioids. Frankly the reason that the prices are so low in the middle of the country is that no one can actually afford anything higher. I was looking at jobs over Idaho. I would literally have to take a 30% pay cut if I took the average job out there.
On top of that, as people with high salaries leave California and move to other states, they're gonna drag up the price of living to California levels. Texas is especially screwed because the oil industry is dying so they're gonna have to raise regular income taxes to make up for the lost oil revenue.
Traffic:
I'm a software engineer and I've never worked in a office. I'd call that a moot point, but now most of us are now working from home. Now, I can get from my house in the burbs to the beach in 30 min. Because work from home is so much cheaper, I don't expect that policy to change.
Homelessness:
If you drive 20 minutes outside of a city center you're not gonna really see that many homeless people. I understand the complaint if you have to live in LA proper, or San Francisco proper. But if you're in a smaller city (aka the vast majority of the state) you're not gonna see any more homelessness than any other state.
Taxes:
Californians demand a lot of social services. Other comparable states, like Nevada and Texas, subsidize their social services by taxing casinos and oil companies respectably. Nevada is probably gonna keep going strong, but Texas is screwed in the long term and will have to raise taxes. And all my friends in Nevada come back to California on the weekends anyway because there's nothing to do over there. Many other states just straight up give you less social services and make up their budget deficits by taking welfare from larger state economies ... like California.
Politics:
I agree our politicians suck and our governor is a loon. But there isn't much space to complain when states like Kentucky keep Mitch McConnel in power for 35 years.
On another note, if you're black (like I am) there aren't a whole lot of states where you can just be treated like an average joe. I remember getting followed around in stores while in every state I visited. In some places, people would cross the street if I can by. And I'm a pretty well kept engineer who can afford decent clothing.
Conclusion:
There's a very small group of very wealthy individuals for whom moving out of the state seems to make sense. But for the average Californian the rest of the country is strictly worse.

Period: 364.05 days

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4310 points, 85 submissions: Superbuddhapunk
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48 points: jesseaknight's comment in In the show St. Elsewhere, a character in the finale is shown to have thought of the whole series, which means he also made up all the shows that had crossovers with St. Elsewhere. This expands into the shows that were mentioned in the shows. There is at this point 419 shows in this universe
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As the developers have focused primarily on the story I know this list is highly improbable. But this is the list of things I want to see in free roam:
We play as Tommy during the time he worked for saleri. We start off living in a small apartment with very little money. Money can be earned with these activities:

Smuggling alcohol shipments from various places and delivering it to saleri. These missions involve shootouts with morello guys or the policr. These missions are given by Frank.
Taking out important guys which involves following a car and killing the person. These missions involves car chases and shootings. These missions are given by Frank.
Stealing cars and selling them to lucas. Lucas will give this mission. We have the option to keep the car depending on the garage size.
Burglary and protection money collection: This would require designing of various indoor maps for players to either go and steal money from houses in complete stealth mode or threaten shop owners for protection money. Protection money missions given by Frank and burglary by Paulie. Burglary to be done strictly only in morello controlled area.
Taking part is races at the circuit. Ability to select different cars and different race structures. These missions can be applied for from the daily newspaper.
Saving someone: one of the characters or a random close associate is kidnapped and we need to go to the location and save them. These are timed missions. After saving them we loot whatever is in the enemy's house/hideouts. These missions maybe given by Frank, Paulie, Ralph, lucas. Ralph and lucas award in cars. Others in money.
Playing games at the casino. Blackjack, poker etc. Casino is on the boat.

As players earn money we can spend it on:

Houses(10 different houses) with different garage sizes.
Clothes
Guns
Cars

Once we buy a third level house with two bedrooms, Sarah moves in.
Random encounters:

House is being attacked. While roaming around we get an alert the house is being attacked by morello guys. We need to drive in time and save it by shooting the guys. Else we have to pay aa hefty price for repairs
Cars being attacked.

While doing any missions between 1 to 4 police may catch us. We need to escape and loose the tail. If we are caught we need to pay a hefty amount for bail.
I don't know if this sounds all gta ( I haven't played any gta till now.Only heard abt it.), But I would pay more for this game if stuff like this is included in free roam. Other than point 4 which requires modelling a lot of interiors, I feel the other points can be implemented.
This will give me time to spend in the beautiful world that they have created.
Thoughts?

[Cover] [Table Of Contents] [Prologue] [Patreon] [Discord] [Join my mailing list to receive a free book]
[Book 1: Relationships]
As Melinda led me towards the ski lodge, I began to wonder what I had gotten myself into. From where we were standing, I could only see the ski slopes, not the tube park. It was pretty cold outside. Maybe Melinda would change her mind and we could just stay in the lodge.
Exploring the cafeteria options, I was glad Melinda had brought us lunch. Nothing sounded very appealing. However, as we debated between getting two sodas or one to share, we saw someone behind the counter putting warm cookies into a display case.
We sat beside each other near the window, where we could watch the mountain while we ate. Melinda was trying to make conversation, but I was only giving her part of my attention as I looked out the window.
I didn’t see anyone tubing. I only saw skiiers. The people on the mountain seemed to be enjoying themselves. I wondered if they knew how dangerous winter mountain sports could be. There was a stretch of the mountain to my left no one seemed to be using. I wondered if they had closed off that part because of some horrible accident.
“You look anxious.” I could hear the concern in her voice. “What’s wrong. Oh! Are you worried about being recognized?”
I turned away from the window. My adorable girlfriend was looking all around as she continued to babble. “I just realized. I’m sorry. I totally forgot.”
“You’re adorable.” I played with her hair before pulling her in for a kiss. Somehow, that calmed me slightly. I explained how the place was so empty I wasn’t too concerned about crazy fans.
“Okay. You’re not worried about being recognized. Is it the whole Poppy thing?”
I smiled at her weakly. “I was wondering when she was going to ruin our time together. I had nearly forgotten about her. I tend not to think about her when I’m with you.”
“What’s happening with all that?”
There was a small red speck barreling downhill. I watched it grow larger as I explained to Melinda how Meghan and I convinced our mother to fire our agent. The red speck eventually turned into a full-sized person who skied straight back onto the empty lift. I turned to Melinda. She began to play with my hand on the table.
“So, now what?”
I picked up my cookie and put it back down a few times without actually eating it.
“I started doing some research, found an agent I like. Mom’s gonna contact him today. We’re gonna try to figure out if Walter and I should have different agents. Meghan is pretty sure she wants Mom’s agent. This is gonna sound pompous, but we’re so famous, most agents would love to represent us.”
“But, what about the Poppy rumor?”
“We fired Cynthia, so Mom’s agent is gonna try to sort things out for us. But, it’s possible it won’t go away. There’s some legal things we might look into, but, honestly, I’m letting Uncle Brendan figure it all out.”
“The lawyer, right?” Melinda asked.
I watched another speck speed down the hill. Melinda slurped the soda we were sharing before trying to resume the conversation.
“If you’re not worried about being recognized, and you’re not upset about Poppy, then why do you look so anxious?”
I wanted to lie, but figured that probably wouldn’t be a great idea. I felt my face grow warm as I turned to her. “I’ve just never gone tubing before.”
Melinda giggled, but she reached around to trace her hand along my spine. That was supposed to be my job. I held her close, playing with her hair as she tried to assuage my fears.
“Tubing is a lot of fun. It’s like sledding. Only faster.”
“It’s dangerous. They make your parent sign one of those waiver things.”
“Yes. But, you also sign a waiver when you visit the town pool. It’s no more dangerous.”
“Are you kidding? The town pool? That’s got kids peeing in the water and people jumping on top of you. That’s got to be more dangerous than this!”
“Fine. Then...laser tag. You have to sign a waiver for that.”
“People running around in the dark? You can trip over something and break your neck. Or, you can trip over the person that tripped over something, and you both break your necks. Or –”
Melinda stopped my babbling with a kiss. That calmed my anxiety a lot. But, I wasn’t going to drop the subject completely. I pulled her close.
“This is nice. Why don’t we just stay here and do this until your mom comes?”
Melinda stood up, giggling as she reached for my hand. “Come on. You clean this mess, and I’ll go get the tickets.”
She tugged me to my feet, then went to the desk near the front entrance while I threw the garbage into the nearest can. A few moments later, she returned with two stickers and two strange-looking metal things. They looked like witches’ hats, or noses.
Melinda showed me how to attach the metal wicket to my zipper, then put the adhesive ticket on either side to create a tag. We bundled ourselves out and went back to the cold.
Melinda led me to the rental building, where an attendant gave us helmets and tubes, which we dragged to the tubing park.
As we approached, I realized we were heading right for the part I had assumed had been closed. There were about ten lanes, divided by mounds of snow, and they had small bumps as they went down the mountain.
Melinda stopped as we got near the bottom of the mountain. “Put down your tube and gimme your hand.”
Gladly. That thing was getting heavy. I held out my arm. “Everything okay?”
Melinda bent down to my tube, picking up a leash I had not noticed earlier. She fastened the strap around my wrist.
“We’re gonna get on the lift now. You can just kinda drag your tube behind you on the way up, okay?”
“How do I get on the lift?”
She pointed to a black belt slowly moving up the mountain. “It’s kinda like an escalator with no stairs. Just step on. Follow me.”
She boarded the lift and I followed. At the top of the mountain, I followed Melinda to a center lane and she showed me how to sit in my tube. Then she moved to the lane beside me.
Before we left, she took her strap from her wrist and tossed it to me. “Here. Hang on to this and we can go down together.”
I held it tight as we pushed off.
Tubing was more exhilarating than I could have imagined. We didn’t go straight downhill. There were bumps. There were dips. The tube slid from side to side within the lane. Before I knew it, we were slowing down at the bottom.
I jumped out of my tube, feeling more alive than I had in a while. “Wow! That was sick. Let’s go again!” I was nearly bouncing with excitement.
Our passes were only good for two hours, and I wanted to get every second’s worth. I raced back to the lift.
I didn’t need to hold Melinda’s leash anymore. I wasn’t scared. As a result, she ended up turning backwards on our next run. I was a little in front of her, so I didn’t notice until we had reached the bottom.
The third time down, I ended up backwards before the first bump. It was even more exhilarating because I had no idea what was coming next. I spent the fourth run figuring out how to do it on purpose, finally succeeding about a third of the way down my fifth run. I spent the rest of the two hours tubing backwards.
The lodge was a little more crowded when we were done tubing. The ski mountain was started to have a little more life as well.
We went back to where we had sat before, where Melinda had left her soft cooler lying. Apparently, it is normal to leave your belongings lying around a ski lodge. I had worried someone would move it or put it in lost and found, but it was exactly where we had left it.
Melinda sat beside me and texted her mother while I emptied the contents of the cooler. She explained her mother was at a nearby mall and would get us in about an hour.
We made peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. After two, I was still hungry. I didn’t say anything, but there must have been something in my expression because Melinda started giggling as she leaned against me slightly.
“Go ahead. I don’t mind.”
“But, I don’t want to turn into my brother.”
“Tubing is a physical activity. You’ve got to replace the calories you just burned.”
“You only had two.”
“I normally don’t eat two. I’ve seen you eat, Pat. Have another sandwich. I promise not to tell Walter.”
As I ate the third sandwich, Melinda told me about how she used to come here with her friends. Then, we talked about how her friends had changed once they started high school.
I felt bad that I couldn’t relate. I had never let anyone get close to me until Hartfield. But, Melinda just seemed to be looking for someone to share her story, not her emotions.
We talked a little about one of my best friends at school, Zach. Then we talked a little about going back to school.
People started coming off the mountain and the lodge was getting a little more crowded. I saw people starting to stare in our direction.
“Can we go somewhere less conspicuous?” I asked as I started packing the picnic back into the cooler.
Melinda looked around. “Yeah, sure. I have an idea.”
We took the cooler and went out a glass door towards the slopes. Melinda backtracked slightly until we were in a small area away from both the lodge and the slopes. A fire pit had been constructed with Adirondack chairs surrounding it.
I sat in one of the chairs, pulling Melinda into my lap. We kissed for a long time, unfazed by the cold, until she thought we should go wait for her mother.

“How was it?” Melinda’s mother asked as she pulled away from the drop off circle.
I smiled. “It was a lot of fun. I’ve never gone tubing before. Thanks for driving me, Mrs. Luzzelli.”
Melinda’s mother smiled. “I’m glad you had fun. Are you going straight home, or were you planning on staying for a while? Either is fine with me.”
I turned to Melinda, sitting beside me in the backseat. “Did you finish that puzzle without me?”
When she shook her head, I turned my attention back to her mother. “I guess that means I’m staying for a little while.”

I placed the last piece into the jigsaw puzzle and stood back to examine my work. The picture displayed three kittens sitting on yarn balls of various colors in a large woven basket.
“It’s cute. It’s a shame we worked so hard and now we have to put it back in the box.”
Melinda went to the closet. “Why?”
“Because we worked so hard on it.” Wasn’t she listening?
“No, I mean, why take it apart?” She returned to the table with a bottle of glue.
“What’s that for?”
“You’ve never glued a puzzle?”
No, because I hadn’t done puzzles since I was little. I had no idea what she meant. I just stared at her.
“We always do this. Look around. All the pictures on the walls are puzzles.”
I did as she said, noticing for the first time that all the artwork on the walls were indeed puzzles of various shapes and sizes. While I was admiring all the framed puzzles, Melinda dumped the glue on top of the one we had just completed, then massaged it between the pieces.
“Aren’t you gonna help me?”
No. It looked squishy and gross. I didn’t want to touch it. I tried to respond as nonchalantly as possible. “And get that all over my fingers?’
Melinda smiled mischievously, then reached for me with her glue-covered hands. I leapt out of her way. I expected her to follow me, but she went back to gluing the puzzle.
I stood beside her, watching over her shoulder before deciding to help. It didn’t take too long and, despite our hands being covered in glue, wasn’t quite as icky as I thought it would be.
When we could no longer see the cats and yarn through the white film, Melinda stood back to admire our handiwork.
“See? Now it’ll dry clear.”
“That’s pretty cool. I may have to start doing this at home.” I meant it, too. Doing the puzzle had been a lot more fun and way more relaxing than I had anticipated. “Now what?”
Melinda led me down the hall. “Well, first we have to wash our hands. We have a little time, but you have to leave by five.”
I couldn’t help but tease her as she entered a bedroom. Since it had a lot of pink and purple, I was pretty sure it was hers.
“Why? Is your other boyfriend coming over?”
“Yes. His name is Eric and my parents like him better than you.”
Melinda turned around. I could tell she was waiting for my response to her joke. (I’m pretty sure it had been a joke.)
Instead, I pointed to the bed. “Is this your bedroom?”
“Yeah. My bathroom’s right here.” Melinda pointed towards a door on the opposite side of the room.
“I can’t go in there.”
“Huh?” Her bafflement was adorable. “Oh. Right. I forgot. Hang on.” Melinda left the bathroom door open as she washed her hands. Then, she came to stand beside me in the doorway.
“There. I think you can go wash your hands, if I stand here.” As I crossed the room, she called after me, “So, what do you want to do now?”
I wasn’t sure if soap would make it harder to get the glue off, but since there were still bubbles in the sink from Melinda, I decided to try it as I answered her. “I have no idea. WTTE?”
“How about cards?”
I made a face into the mirror, but I was pretty sure she couldn’t see me. I waited until I was beside her before responding. “I can play solitaire.”
I followed her back to the study, where Melinda took two decks of cards from a box in the closet. “How about double solitaire?” Melinda suggested as she sat on the floor.
“That’s a game?” I sat on the floor across from her and watched her shuffle. It was different than the normal way. There was something about it that was familiar.
“Mom and Dad had a casino party once.” My eyes were fixed on her hands. “They hired actual dealers from real casinos. They shuffled the cards like that, at the corners. Are you a card shark?”
Melinda giggled. “My grandfather loves playing cards. He taught me when I was seven. I could shuffle better than him by the time I started middle school.”
“You are a card shark! I don’t wanna play with you.”
“It’s only solitaire. Watch.” She handed me the deck of red cards.
I copied Melinda as we laid out cards in front of ourselves and created playing slots. She explained how to play our personal space and the shared space. After she explained the scoring, we played the first round.
I picked up my pile in my left hand and prepared my right to flip the first cards when Melinda gave the signal.
She beat me, forty to twenty in the first round, but I was a fast learner and I reached a hundred points in the third round, while she still had eighty-nine.
We separated the decks and she said she would teach me to play War. She then described the game I played with my roommate.
“Wait. I know this game. This is the game I play with Frank.”
“I thought you said you only play solitaire.”
“Well, I didn’t know the name of this game. He calls it something else. Jung-Jang, I think. His grandfather taught him. One of his grandfathers speaks Korean, the other one Chinese. I’m not sure which one taught him the game.”
Melinda smiled as she picked up her stack and we began flipping the cards. I won the first game and she won the second. We had just separated the stacks for a tiebreaker round when her other boyfriend arrived.

“Melinda!” Her mother called up the stairs a few moments after we heard the doorbell sound. “Your ride is here.”
Oh man! I had lost all track of time. I kept my voice low as Melinda packed the cards away.
“I didn’t get to say goodbye.”
She turned and put her arms around my neck. “I’ll see you Sunday. I’ll try to get back to campus early.” Our kiss was interrupted by a knock on the door.
Melinda’s roommate was standing just over the threshold with a knowing smile. “Sorry.”
Her miniature clone peered around her into the room. I had met her once before, so I knew she wasn’t about to turn into a screaming fan. She started waving at Melinda, but when she saw me, she started signing frantically.
Although I had learned American Sign Language for my last film, I was not able to follow Crystal when she got excited. I missed a lot of what she was asking, but I got the impression she wanted to know why I was there and if Melinda was my girlfriend.
I laughed, speaking aloud as I signed. “Slow down! Melinda will tell you all about it later. I better get home. Hi, Sarah. Bye, Sarah!”
I smiled at Melinda’s roommate, kissed the top of Melinda’s head quickly, then started out of the room, the three girls in tow. As I got in my car, I saw Melinda wave one last time before shutting the door.

[Table Of Contents] [Chapter 13, Part 2]
Want to read more about Walter and Melinda? Check out Boarding School Blues - Chapter 37: Tubing

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This is Book 4: Boarding School Break: Happy Thanksgiving
[Book 2: Boarding School Beginnings] [Book 3: Boarding School Boyfriends]
I have always loved the snow. Every snow day, my father would take my brother and I to the big hill at our school. I would sit on my sled, with my friends nearby, and we would race down the hill, laughing the entire way. Then, we would drag our sleds back up the hill, ready to go again.
When I was nine, my friends brought me to the local ski mountain to go tubing. They showed me how to bring my tube to the top of the mountain and how to ride it down, much like riding my sled. The tubing mountain was fantastic. Even though I was going downhill the entire time, there were little hills along the trail that would slow me down and speed me up.
The next snow day, I realized that sledding was no longer fun. It could not compare to the thrill of tubing. That winter, my friends and I made a pact to go tubing the first Saturday of each month as long as the mountain was open.
This will be the first year I’m tubing without them. I wonder if they will keep up the tradition without me.
Pat and Melinda climbed out of her mother’s car as she idled in front of the ski mountain Friday morning.
“I’ll be back around one. Call me if you’re done earlier, but keep in mind, it takes me nearly an hour to get here.”
“Will do,” Melinda said.
Melinda watched her mother drive away before reaching for Pat’s hand, which was difficult to grasp since they both were wearing gloves. “So, do you want to eat first or go tubing?”
“It’s been at least two hours since I last ate. Food first.” Pat sent her his famous smile.
Melinda returned his smile as they walked into the lodge, which was nearly abandoned that morning. They wandered through the cafeteria, deciding to order a soda to share and some freshly made cookies.
Melinda’s previous boyfriends had always paid for their own food, which Melinda found comforting, since she was never sure when she was supposed to pay for other people. Today, however, her mother had given her some cash to pay for both their tubing tickets. When Melinda had informed Pat, he offered to buy the snacks.
They brought their snack to the upper level of the lodge, sitting at a table in the back corner of the room. They were able to watch skiers going up the lifts and coming back down the mountain, while no one was using the tubing section on the far left of the mountain.
Melinda took a bite of her cookie before waving it towards Pat beside her.
“Random question. And, it’s purely because I’m curious. Do you get an allowance?”
Pat smiled. “What do you think?” He stared out the window while he waited for Melinda’s answer.
“See, I never had an allowance. My parents just kinda give me money when I need to buy something. Like, my mom gave me money for tubing today. But, I think your parents are different. I bet you get an allowance. And, I know you get paid for your movies. I bet that goes into some sort of college fund and you get paid from your parents’ money.”
“Meghan’s right. You are insightful.” Pat’s gaze never left the window.
Melinda observed Pat for a few moments. “You look anxious,” she finally decided. “What’s wrong?”
Before he could answer, she was hit with a sudden realization. “Oh! Are you worried about being recognized? I just realized. I’m sorry. I totally forgot.” She began looking around, but they were the only ones there.
Pat turned back to her and smiled warmly, reaching out to touch her hair. “You’re adorable.” He leaned in to kiss her.
“No,” he said a few minutes later, when Melinda’s heartbeat began to return to its normal rhythm. “I thought about it briefly, but figured I would be so bundled up that no one would recognize me. And, it’s pretty derelict here.”
“Derelict?”
Pat smiled, brushing back her hair. “Um…abandoned. Deserted. Almost neglectfully.”
Melinda looked around, understanding Pat’s description. The lodge felt very old and unused. The wooden benches where they sat were slightly splintered and some of the tables had initials carved into them. The fireplace in the corner was unlit. Whenever Melinda had previously visited, it was always so full of people that it gave a homey feeling. However, with no other people around to give the room life, it did feel somewhat neglected.
Melinda returned her attention to Pat. “Okay. You’re not worried about being recognized. Is it the whole Poppy thing?”
Pat smiled at her weakly. “I was wondering when she was going to ruin our time together. I had nearly forgotten about her. I tend not to think about her when I’m with you.”
“What’s happening with all that?” Melinda was trying to sound casual, but she was anxious to hear his answer.
Pat shrugged, again staring out the window as he answered. “Tuesday, after we all calmed down about the incident with Poppy, Meghan and I spent most of lunch having a long talk with Mom about Cynthia. We explained how she’s not looking out for our best interests anymore.”
Pat looked at Melinda, tracing circles on the back of Melinda’s hand that was resting on the table. “By the end of the meal, I had started to worry about finding a new agent. When we got to the studio to pick up Walter, Mom called Cynthia to fire her.”
“So, now what?”
Pat started playing absently with the cookie on his plate. “I started doing some research, found an agent I like. Mom’s gonna contact him today. We’re gonna try to figure out if Walter and I should have different agents. Meghan is pretty sure she wants Mom’s agent. This is gonna sound pompous, but we’re so famous, most agents would love to represent us.”
Pat gave Melinda a weak smile that did not reach his eyes. Melinda smiled back.
“But, what about the Poppy rumor?”
Pat made a face and shook his head. “We fired Cynthia, so Mom’s agent is gonna try to sort things out for us. But, it’s possible it won’t go away. There’s some legal things we might look into, but, honestly, I’m letting Uncle Brendan figure it all out.”
“The lawyer, right?”
Pat nodded, looking back out the window. Melinda took a sip of her soda as she considered Pat for a moment. “If you’re not worried about being recognized, and you’re not upset about Poppy, then why do you look so anxious?”
To Melinda’s amazement, Pat began to turn red. “I’ve just never gone tubing before.”
Melinda giggled, but she rubbed her hand gently up and down Pat’s lower back as she tried to assuage his fear.
“Tubing is a lot of fun. It’s like sledding. Only faster.”
“It’s dangerous. They make your parent sign one of those waiver things.”
Melinda rolled her eyes, giggling when it seemed to distress Pat even more. “Yes, but, you also sign a waiver when you visit the town pool. It’s no more dangerous.”
“Are you kidding? The town pool? That’s got kids peeing in the water and people jumping on top of you. That’s got to be more dangerous than this!”
“Fine. Then…laser tag. You have to sign a waiver for that.”
“People running around in the dark? You can trip over something and break your neck. Or, you can trip over the person that tripped over something, and you both break your necks. Or –”
Melinda kissed Pat to get him to stop rambling. He pulled her close.
“This is nice. Why don’t we just stay here and do this until your mom comes?”
Melinda giggled as she stood, taking Pat’s hand to pull him up. “Come on. You clean this mess, and I’ll go get the tickets.”

It took nearly half an hour for Melinda and Pat to put on all their cold weather gear, collect their tubes and helmets from the rentals building, and trudge to the tubing park. This area of the mountain had ten lanes carved into the snow with walls about the height of the tube to separate each lane.
Melinda showed Pat how to attach his tube to his wrist using the strap, then hold on to his tube while he stepped onto the magic carpet lift.
“It’s like the moving walkways the have at the airport!” Pat announced.
At the top of the mountain, they selected adjoining lanes and Melinda showed Pat how to climb into his tube. Then, she removed the strap from her wrist and tossed it to Pat. “Here. Hang on to this and we can go down together.” Pat did as instructed, and they headed down the mountain.
They swerved up and down their lanes, both squealing in delight as they headed down the mountain, occasionally going over slight bumps in the hill, until they skidded to a stop at the end.
Pat jumped to his feet excitedly. “Wow! That was sick. Let’s go again!”
Melinda lost track of how many times they went down the mountain during the two-hours their passes were valid. On the second run, Melinda ended up turning around after the third bump. The following run, Pat was backwards after the first few feet. He enjoyed it so much, that by the fifth run, he had figured out how to make himself turn backwards for most of the way down the mountain.

When they returned to the lodge, Pat and Melinda returned to their table in the back of the room. There were only a handful more people in the lodge, since most of the skiers were still on the mountain. Melinda texted her mother that they were finished and they were about to eat.
Melinda had packed jars of peanut butter and jelly and a loaf of bread, and they made their own sandwiches. After they had each eaten two, Pat was still eyeing the bag of bread.
Melinda giggled. “Go ahead. I don’t mind.”
“But, I don’t want to turn into my brother.”
“Tubing is a physical activity. You’ve got to replace the calories you just burned.”
“You only had two.”
“I normally don’t eat two. I’ve seen you eat, Pat. Have another sandwich. I promise not to tell Walter.”
Pat smiled as he made another sandwich. “So, you’ve been here before?”
Melinda nodded. “My friends and I used to come all the time. I’m shorter than them, so they had been once or twice before I was tall enough to join them. It became an annual thing: go tubing one weekend a month all season.”
“You still do it? Go tubing with them?”
Melinda looked down and sighed. Instinctively, Pat gently rubbed his hand up and down her lower back. She leaned into him.
“Did you have any friends who changed when they started high school? Like, not in a good way?”
Pat considered a moment. “Not really. But, I didn’t have a lot of good friends before Hartfield. Some Hollywood friends, some homeschooling friends locally, but no one close. I didn’t mind. I had Meghan and Walter.”
“I had two really good friends growing up. We did everything together. Looking back, I can see a little how I was different from them. Like, they were always calling me Bookworm. Affectionately, but still. Anyway, when they started high school, they became all boy crazy and just totally different. The first time I came home, I went to a football game with them. As soon as we got there, they stripped into really skimpy clothes, put on a thick layer of makeup, and went outside to smoke cigarettes with their boyfriends. Then, they left me alone with some stranger who assumed I was going to make out with him.”
“I’m sorry,” Pat held her close and played with her hair. “I’ve seen that happen too many times. I’d do a movie with people I liked and respected, and then the movie’s over. The next time I see them, they’ve completely changed and I no longer can like and respect them. I can’t say it’s ever happened to a good friend, though.”
“I don’t mind too much. I have Sarah and Walter now.”
“That reminds me,” Pat sat back a little and snapped his fingers. “Zach finally plugged his phone in and has joined the land of the living. He’s looking forward to meeting you next week.”
“Your best friend? He’s home from Spain?”
“Not yet. His term isn’t over until the end of this week. He’s flying into New York early Sunday and heading straight to campus. He’s not even bothering to see his parents. Then again, I think they went there to visit him this week.”

When Melinda’s mother arrived, Melinda and Pat were sitting on a bench in front of the lodge. As people began coming into the lodge for lunch, Melinda and Pat noticed people pointing in their direction. They decided to move outside where Pat could wrap himself in his scarf and hat to be less recognizable. After sitting alone by the fire pit, kissing for a long while, they had headed to the bench near the drop off area.
From their perch, they could watch both the parking lot and the skiers on the mountain. Most of the people in the circle were dropping off their teenagers, not picking them up, and Melinda caught a few sideways glances as they were getting into the car.
Melinda’s mother glanced at them in the rearview mirror as she pulled away. “How was tubing?”
Pat smiled. “It was a lot of fun. I’ve never gone tubing before. Thanks for driving me, Mrs. Luzzelli.”
“I’m glad you had fun. Are you going straight home, or were you planning on staying for a while? Either is fine with me.”
Pat turned to Melinda. “Did you finish that puzzle without me?” When she shook her head, he shrugged. “I guess that means I’m staying for a little while.”

Melinda let Pat place the last piece into the puzzle. He stared for a moment at the three kittens sitting in a large basket of brightly colored yarn balls. “It’s cute. It’s a shame we worked so hard and now we have to put it back in the box.”
“Why?” Melinda went to search the closet.
“Because we worked so hard on it.”
“No, I mean, why take it apart?” She returned to the table with a bottle of glue.
“What’s that for?”
“You’ve never glued a puzzle?” When Pat stared at her with raised eyebrows, Melinda explained. “We always do this. Look around. All the pictures on the walls are puzzles.”
Melinda unscrewed the top from the bottle and poured a copious amount on top. Then, she began spreading it around with her fingers.
“Aren’t you gonna help me?”
Pat raised his eyebrows. “And get that all over my fingers?’
Melinda tried to attack him with her gluey hands, but he was able to dodge her. She decided against chasing him, and after a moment, he was beside her, helping her get glue into each crack. They ended up using almost the entire bottle of glue, but eventually it was covered with a thin white film. Melinda smiled at him.
“See? Now it’ll dry clear.”
“That’s pretty cool. I may have to start doing this at home. Now what?”
“Well, first we have to wash our hands.” Melinda led the way to the bathroom. “We have a little time, but you have to leave by five.”
“Why? Is your other boyfriend coming over?”
“Yes. His name is Eric and my parents like him better than you.”
When Pat did not reply, Melinda looked around. He had stopped in the doorway on the other side of her room. He gestured towards the bed.
“Is this your bedroom?”
“Yeah. My bathroom’s right here.” Melinda pointed towards a door on the opposite side of the room.
“I can’t go in there.”
“Huh? Oh. Right. I forgot. Hang on.” Melinda washed her hands, then returned to the hallway. “There. I think you can go wash your hands, if I stand here. So, what do you want to do now?”
Pat called through the room. “I have no idea. WTTE?”
“How about cards?”
Pat crossed the room back to her. “I can play solitaire.”
“How about double solitaire?”
They returned to the study, where Melinda retrieved two decks of card from the closet.
“That’s a game?” Pat joined Melinda on the floor, where she had sat to avoid getting glue all over the cards. He watched her shuffle each deck with a practiced ease. “Mom and Dad had a casino party once. They hired actual dealers from real casinos. They shuffled the cards like that, at the corners. Are you a card shark?”
Melinda giggled. “My grandfather loves playing cards. He taught me when I was seven. I could shuffle better than him by the time I started middle school.”
Pat raised his eyebrows. “You are a card shark! I don’t wanna play with you.”
“It’s only solitaire. Watch.” She handed him the deck of red cards. “Do what I do. First, count out thirteen cards and put them on the left. Turn the last one face up.”
Pat followed Melinda’s directions and she continued. “Now, place four cards face up on the right of the stack. These will be your playing slots later. Now, this is your personal area.”
Pat pointed to Melinda’s pile. “That’s my personal area? It looks like yours.”
Melinda made a face at him and continued to explain the rules.
“Got it. Alright. I’m ready.” Pat leaned in closer to his cards, picking up his deck in one hand and getting his other hand ready to flip his first card.
Melinda giggled. “Okay. Go!”

It took three rounds before Pat reached 100 points, beating Melinda by two points. After they separated the decks, Melinda taught Pat how to play War.
Melinda began to explain how to play, but Pat interrupted after a moment. “Wait, I know this game. This is the game I play with Frank,” he said, referring to his roommate at school, whose real name was Pete Wu. He had earned himself the nickname Frankenstein as a third former, and now most people called him Frank.
“I thought you said you only play solitaire.”
“Well, I didn’t know the name of this game. He calls it something else. Jung-Jang, I think. His grandfather taught him. One of his grandfathers speaks Korean, the other one Chinese. I’m not sure which one taught him the game.”
Melinda just shook her head as they played a lively battle of war. They had each won a game when Melinda’s mother called that her ride had arrived.

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[Table Of Contents] [Chapter 7]
Follow follow Patrick McGregor's story in Confessions of a Teenage Celebrity - Chapter 4: Tubing

[Cover] [Chapter 1] [Table Of Contents] [Patreon] [Discord] [Join my mailing list to receive a free book]
This is Book 4: Boarding School Break: Happy Thanksgiving
[Book 2: Boarding School Beginnings] [Book 3: Boarding School Boyfriends]
I have always loved the snow. Every snow day, my father would take my brother and I to the big hill at our school. I would sit on my sled, with my friends nearby, and we would race down the hill, laughing the entire way. Then, we would drag our sleds back up the hill, ready to go again.
When I was nine, my friends brought me to the local ski mountain to go tubing. They showed me how to bring my tube to the top of the mountain and how to ride it down, much like riding my sled. The tubing mountain was fantastic. Even though I was going downhill the entire time, there were little hills along the trail that would slow me down and speed me up.
The next snow day, I realized that sledding was no longer fun. It could not compare to the thrill of tubing. That winter, my friends and I made a pact to go tubing the first Saturday of each month as long as the mountain was open.
This will be the first year I’m tubing without them. I wonder if they will keep up the tradition without me.
Pat and Melinda climbed out of her mother’s car as she idled in front of the ski mountain Friday morning.
“I’ll be back around one. Call me if you’re done earlier, but keep in mind, it takes me nearly an hour to get here.”
“Will do,” Melinda said.
Melinda watched her mother drive away before reaching for Pat’s hand, which was difficult to grasp since they both were wearing gloves. “So, do you want to eat first or go tubing?”
“It’s been at least two hours since I last ate. Food first.” Pat sent her his famous smile.
Melinda returned his smile as they walked into the lodge, which was nearly abandoned that morning. They wandered through the cafeteria, deciding to order a soda to share and some freshly made cookies.
Melinda’s previous boyfriends had always paid for their own food, which Melinda found comforting, since she was never sure when she was supposed to pay for other people. Today, however, her mother had given her some cash to pay for both their tubing tickets. When Melinda had informed Pat, he offered to buy the snacks.
They brought their snack to the upper level of the lodge, sitting at a table in the back corner of the room. They were able to watch skiers going up the lifts and coming back down the mountain, while no one was using the tubing section on the far left of the mountain.
Melinda took a bite of her cookie before waving it towards Pat beside her.
“Random question. And, it’s purely because I’m curious. Do you get an allowance?”
Pat smiled. “What do you think?” He stared out the window while he waited for Melinda’s answer.
“See, I never had an allowance. My parents just kinda give me money when I need to buy something. Like, my mom gave me money for tubing today. But, I think your parents are different. I bet you get an allowance. And, I know you get paid for your movies. I bet that goes into some sort of college fund and you get paid from your parents’ money.”
“Meghan’s right. You are insightful.” Pat’s gaze never left the window.
Melinda observed Pat for a few moments. “You look anxious,” she finally decided. “What’s wrong?”
Before he could answer, she was hit with a sudden realization. “Oh! Are you worried about being recognized? I just realized. I’m sorry. I totally forgot.” She began looking around, but they were the only ones there.
Pat turned back to her and smiled warmly, reaching out to touch her hair. “You’re adorable.” He leaned in to kiss her.
“No,” he said a few minutes later, when Melinda’s heartbeat began to return to its normal rhythm. “I thought about it briefly, but figured I would be so bundled up that no one would recognize me. And, it’s pretty derelict here.”
“Derelict?”
Pat smiled, brushing back her hair. “Um…abandoned. Deserted. Almost neglectfully.”
Melinda looked around, understanding Pat’s description. The lodge felt very old and unused. The wooden benches where they sat were slightly splintered and some of the tables had initials carved into them. The fireplace in the corner was unlit. Whenever Melinda had previously visited, it was always so full of people that it gave a homey feeling. However, with no other people around to give the room life, it did feel somewhat neglected.
Melinda returned her attention to Pat. “Okay. You’re not worried about being recognized. Is it the whole Poppy thing?”
Pat smiled at her weakly. “I was wondering when she was going to ruin our time together. I had nearly forgotten about her. I tend not to think about her when I’m with you.”
“What’s happening with all that?” Melinda was trying to sound casual, but she was anxious to hear his answer.
Pat shrugged, again staring out the window as he answered. “Tuesday, after we all calmed down about the incident with Poppy, Meghan and I spent most of lunch having a long talk with Mom about Cynthia. We explained how she’s not looking out for our best interests anymore.”
Pat looked at Melinda, tracing circles on the back of Melinda’s hand that was resting on the table. “By the end of the meal, I had started to worry about finding a new agent. When we got to the studio to pick up Walter, Mom called Cynthia to fire her.”
“So, now what?”
Pat started playing absently with the cookie on his plate. “I started doing some research, found an agent I like. Mom’s gonna contact him today. We’re gonna try to figure out if Walter and I should have different agents. Meghan is pretty sure she wants Mom’s agent. This is gonna sound pompous, but we’re so famous, most agents would love to represent us.”
Pat gave Melinda a weak smile that did not reach his eyes. Melinda smiled back.
“But, what about the Poppy rumor?”
Pat made a face and shook his head. “We fired Cynthia, so Mom’s agent is gonna try to sort things out for us. But, it’s possible it won’t go away. There’s some legal things we might look into, but, honestly, I’m letting Uncle Brendan figure it all out.”
“The lawyer, right?”
Pat nodded, looking back out the window. Melinda took a sip of her soda as she considered Pat for a moment. “If you’re not worried about being recognized, and you’re not upset about Poppy, then why do you look so anxious?”
To Melinda’s amazement, Pat began to turn red. “I’ve just never gone tubing before.”
Melinda giggled, but she rubbed her hand gently up and down Pat’s lower back as she tried to assuage his fear.
“Tubing is a lot of fun. It’s like sledding. Only faster.”
“It’s dangerous. They make your parent sign one of those waiver things.”
Melinda rolled her eyes, giggling when it seemed to distress Pat even more. “Yes, but, you also sign a waiver when you visit the town pool. It’s no more dangerous.”
“Are you kidding? The town pool? That’s got kids peeing in the water and people jumping on top of you. That’s got to be more dangerous than this!”
“Fine. Then…laser tag. You have to sign a waiver for that.”
“People running around in the dark? You can trip over something and break your neck. Or, you can trip over the person that tripped over something, and you both break your necks. Or –”
Melinda kissed Pat to get him to stop rambling. He pulled her close.
“This is nice. Why don’t we just stay here and do this until your mom comes?”
Melinda giggled as she stood, taking Pat’s hand to pull him up. “Come on. You clean this mess, and I’ll go get the tickets.”

It took nearly half an hour for Melinda and Pat to put on all their cold weather gear, collect their tubes and helmets from the rentals building, and trudge to the tubing park. This area of the mountain had ten lanes carved into the snow with walls about the height of the tube to separate each lane.
Melinda showed Pat how to attach his tube to his wrist using the strap, then hold on to his tube while he stepped onto the magic carpet lift.
“It’s like the moving walkways the have at the airport!” Pat announced.
At the top of the mountain, they selected adjoining lanes and Melinda showed Pat how to climb into his tube. Then, she removed the strap from her wrist and tossed it to Pat. “Here. Hang on to this and we can go down together.” Pat did as instructed, and they headed down the mountain.
They swerved up and down their lanes, both squealing in delight as they headed down the mountain, occasionally going over slight bumps in the hill, until they skidded to a stop at the end.
Pat jumped to his feet excitedly. “Wow! That was sick. Let’s go again!”
Melinda lost track of how many times they went down the mountain during the two-hours their passes were valid. On the second run, Melinda ended up turning around after the third bump. The following run, Pat was backwards after the first few feet. He enjoyed it so much, that by the fifth run, he had figured out how to make himself turn backwards for most of the way down the mountain.

When they returned to the lodge, Pat and Melinda returned to their table in the back of the room. There were only a handful more people in the lodge, since most of the skiers were still on the mountain. Melinda texted her mother that they were finished and they were about to eat.
Melinda had packed jars of peanut butter and jelly and a loaf of bread, and they made their own sandwiches. After they had each eaten two, Pat was still eyeing the bag of bread.
Melinda giggled. “Go ahead. I don’t mind.”
“But, I don’t want to turn into my brother.”
“Tubing is a physical activity. You’ve got to replace the calories you just burned.”
“You only had two.”
“I normally don’t eat two. I’ve seen you eat, Pat. Have another sandwich. I promise not to tell Walter.”
Pat smiled as he made another sandwich. “So, you’ve been here before?”
Melinda nodded. “My friends and I used to come all the time. I’m shorter than them, so they had been once or twice before I was tall enough to join them. It became an annual thing: go tubing one weekend a month all season.”
“You still do it? Go tubing with them?”
Melinda looked down and sighed. Instinctively, Pat gently rubbed his hand up and down her lower back. She leaned into him.
“Did you have any friends who changed when they started high school? Like, not in a good way?”
Pat considered a moment. “Not really. But, I didn’t have a lot of good friends before Hartfield. Some Hollywood friends, some homeschooling friends locally, but no one close. I didn’t mind. I had Meghan and Walter.”
“I had two really good friends growing up. We did everything together. Looking back, I can see a little how I was different from them. Like, they were always calling me Bookworm. Affectionately, but still. Anyway, when they started high school, they became all boy crazy and just totally different. The first time I came home, I went to a football game with them. As soon as we got there, they stripped into really skimpy clothes, put on a thick layer of makeup, and went outside to smoke cigarettes with their boyfriends. Then, they left me alone with some stranger who assumed I was going to make out with him.”
“I’m sorry,” Pat held her close and played with her hair. “I’ve seen that happen too many times. I’d do a movie with people I liked and respected, and then the movie’s over. The next time I see them, they’ve completely changed and I no longer can like and respect them. I can’t say it’s ever happened to a good friend, though.”
“I don’t mind too much. I have Sarah and Walter now.”
“That reminds me,” Pat sat back a little and snapped his fingers. “Zach finally plugged his phone in and has joined the land of the living. He’s looking forward to meeting you next week.”
“Your best friend? He’s home from Spain?”
“Not yet. His term isn’t over until the end of this week. He’s flying into New York early Sunday and heading straight to campus. He’s not even bothering to see his parents. Then again, I think they went there to visit him this week.”

When Melinda’s mother arrived, Melinda and Pat were sitting on a bench in front of the lodge. As people began coming into the lodge for lunch, Melinda and Pat noticed people pointing in their direction. They decided to move outside where Pat could wrap himself in his scarf and hat to be less recognizable. After sitting alone by the fire pit, kissing for a long while, they had headed to the bench near the drop off area.
From their perch, they could watch both the parking lot and the skiers on the mountain. Most of the people in the circle were dropping off their teenagers, not picking them up, and Melinda caught a few sideways glances as they were getting into the car.
Melinda’s mother glanced at them in the rearview mirror as she pulled away. “How was tubing?”
Pat smiled. “It was a lot of fun. I’ve never gone tubing before. Thanks for driving me, Mrs. Luzzelli.”
“I’m glad you had fun. Are you going straight home, or were you planning on staying for a while? Either is fine with me.”
Pat turned to Melinda. “Did you finish that puzzle without me?” When she shook her head, he shrugged. “I guess that means I’m staying for a little while.”

Melinda let Pat place the last piece into the puzzle. He stared for a moment at the three kittens sitting in a large basket of brightly colored yarn balls. “It’s cute. It’s a shame we worked so hard and now we have to put it back in the box.”
“Why?” Melinda went to search the closet.
“Because we worked so hard on it.”
“No, I mean, why take it apart?” She returned to the table with a bottle of glue.
“What’s that for?”
“You’ve never glued a puzzle?” When Pat stared at her with raised eyebrows, Melinda explained. “We always do this. Look around. All the pictures on the walls are puzzles.”
Melinda unscrewed the top from the bottle and poured a copious amount on top. Then, she began spreading it around with her fingers.
“Aren’t you gonna help me?”
Pat raised his eyebrows. “And get that all over my fingers?’
Melinda tried to attack him with her gluey hands, but he was able to dodge her. She decided against chasing him, and after a moment, he was beside her, helping her get glue into each crack. They ended up using almost the entire bottle of glue, but eventually it was covered with a thin white film. Melinda smiled at him.
“See? Now it’ll dry clear.”
“That’s pretty cool. I may have to start doing this at home. Now what?”
“Well, first we have to wash our hands.” Melinda led the way to the bathroom. “We have a little time, but you have to leave by five.”
“Why? Is your other boyfriend coming over?”
“Yes. His name is Eric and my parents like him better than you.”
When Pat did not reply, Melinda looked around. He had stopped in the doorway on the other side of her room. He gestured towards the bed.
“Is this your bedroom?”
“Yeah. My bathroom’s right here.” Melinda pointed towards a door on the opposite side of the room.
“I can’t go in there.”
“Huh? Oh. Right. I forgot. Hang on.” Melinda washed her hands, then returned to the hallway. “There. I think you can go wash your hands, if I stand here. So, what do you want to do now?”
Pat called through the room. “I have no idea. WTTE?”
“How about cards?”
Pat crossed the room back to her. “I can play solitaire.”
“How about double solitaire?”
They returned to the study, where Melinda retrieved two decks of card from the closet.
“That’s a game?” Pat joined Melinda on the floor, where she had sat to avoid getting glue all over the cards. He watched her shuffle each deck with a practiced ease. “Mom and Dad had a casino party once. They hired actual dealers from real casinos. They shuffled the cards like that, at the corners. Are you a card shark?”
Melinda giggled. “My grandfather loves playing cards. He taught me when I was seven. I could shuffle better than him by the time I started middle school.”
Pat raised his eyebrows. “You are a card shark! I don’t wanna play with you.”
“It’s only solitaire. Watch.” She handed him the deck of red cards. “Do what I do. First, count out thirteen cards and put them on the left. Turn the last one face up.”
Pat followed Melinda’s directions and she continued. “Now, place four cards face up on the right of the stack. These will be your playing slots later. Now, this is your personal area.”
Pat pointed to Melinda’s pile. “That’s my personal area? It looks like yours.”
Melinda made a face at him and continued to explain the rules.
“Got it. Alright. I’m ready.” Pat leaned in closer to his cards, picking up his deck in one hand and getting his other hand ready to flip his first card.
Melinda giggled. “Okay. Go!”

It took three rounds before Pat reached 100 points, beating Melinda by two points. After they separated the decks, Melinda taught Pat how to play War.
Melinda began to explain how to play, but Pat interrupted after a moment. “Wait, I know this game. This is the game I play with Frank,” he said, referring to his roommate at school, whose real name was Pete Wu. He had earned himself the nickname Frankenstein as a third former, and now most people called him Frank.
“I thought you said you only play solitaire.”
“Well, I didn’t know the name of this game. He calls it something else. Jung-Jang, I think. His grandfather taught him. One of his grandfathers speaks Korean, the other one Chinese. I’m not sure which one taught him the game.”
Melinda just shook her head as they played a lively battle of war. They had each won a game when Melinda’s mother called that her ride had arrived.

[Table Of Contents] [Chapter 38]
Follow Patrick McGregor's story in Confessions of a Teenage Celebrity - Chapter 13: Tubing

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As Melinda led me towards the ski lodge, I began to wonder what I had gotten myself into. From where we were standing, I could only see the ski slopes, not the tube park. It was pretty cold outside. Maybe Melinda would change her mind and we could just stay in the lodge.
Exploring the cafeteria options, I was glad Melinda had brought us lunch. Nothing sounded very appealing. However, as we debated between getting two sodas or one to share, we saw someone behind the counter putting warm cookies into a display case.
We sat beside each other near the window, where we could watch the mountain while we ate. Melinda was trying to make conversation, but I was only giving her part of my attention as I looked out the window.
I didn’t see anyone tubing. I only saw skiiers. The people on the mountain seemed to be enjoying themselves. I wondered if they knew how dangerous winter mountain sports could be. There was a stretch of the mountain to my left no one seemed to be using. I wondered if they had closed off that part because of some horrible accident.
“You look anxious.” I could hear the concern in her voice. “What’s wrong. Oh! Are you worried about being recognized?”
I turned away from the window. My adorable girlfriend was looking all around as she continued to babble. “I just realized. I’m sorry. I totally forgot.”
“You’re adorable.” I played with her hair before pulling her in for a kiss. Somehow, that calmed me slightly. I explained how the place was so empty I wasn’t too concerned about crazy fans.
“Okay. You’re not worried about being recognized. Is it the whole Poppy thing?”
I smiled at her weakly. “I was wondering when she was going to ruin our time together. I had nearly forgotten about her. I tend not to think about her when I’m with you.”
“What’s happening with all that?”
There was a small red speck barreling downhill. I watched it grow larger as I explained to Melinda how Meghan and I convinced our mother to fire our agent. The red speck eventually turned into a full-sized person who skied straight back onto the empty lift. I turned to Melinda. She began to play with my hand on the table.
“So, now what?”
I picked up my cookie and put it back down a few times without actually eating it.
“I started doing some research, found an agent I like. Mom’s gonna contact him today. We’re gonna try to figure out if Walter and I should have different agents. Meghan is pretty sure she wants Mom’s agent. This is gonna sound pompous, but we’re so famous, most agents would love to represent us.”
“But, what about the Poppy rumor?”
“We fired Cynthia, so Mom’s agent is gonna try to sort things out for us. But, it’s possible it won’t go away. There’s some legal things we might look into, but, honestly, I’m letting Uncle Brendan figure it all out.”
“The lawyer, right?” Melinda asked.
I watched another speck speed down the hill. Melinda slurped the soda we were sharing before trying to resume the conversation.
“If you’re not worried about being recognized, and you’re not upset about Poppy, then why do you look so anxious?”
I wanted to lie, but figured that probably wouldn’t be a great idea. I felt my face grow warm as I turned to her. “I’ve just never gone tubing before.”
Melinda giggled, but she reached around to trace her hand along my spine. That was supposed to be my job. I held her close, playing with her hair as she tried to assuage my fears.
“Tubing is a lot of fun. It’s like sledding. Only faster.”
“It’s dangerous. They make your parent sign one of those waiver things.”
“Yes. But, you also sign a waiver when you visit the town pool. It’s no more dangerous.”
“Are you kidding? The town pool? That’s got kids peeing in the water and people jumping on top of you. That’s got to be more dangerous than this!”
“Fine. Then...laser tag. You have to sign a waiver for that.”
“People running around in the dark? You can trip over something and break your neck. Or, you can trip over the person that tripped over something, and you both break your necks. Or –”
Melinda stopped my babbling with a kiss. That calmed my anxiety a lot. But, I wasn’t going to drop the subject completely. I pulled her close.
“This is nice. Why don’t we just stay here and do this until your mom comes?”
Melinda stood up, giggling as she reached for my hand. “Come on. You clean this mess, and I’ll go get the tickets.”
She tugged me to my feet, then went to the desk near the front entrance while I threw the garbage into the nearest can. A few moments later, she returned with two stickers and two strange-looking metal things. They looked like witches’ hats, or noses.
Melinda showed me how to attach the metal wicket to my zipper, then put the adhesive ticket on either side to create a tag. We bundled ourselves out and went back to the cold.
Melinda led me to the rental building, where an attendant gave us helmets and tubes, which we dragged to the tubing park.
As we approached, I realized we were heading right for the part I had assumed had been closed. There were about ten lanes, divided by mounds of snow, and they had small bumps as they went down the mountain.
Melinda stopped as we got near the bottom of the mountain. “Put down your tube and gimme your hand.”
Gladly. That thing was getting heavy. I held out my arm. “Everything okay?”
Melinda bent down to my tube, picking up a leash I had not noticed earlier. She fastened the strap around my wrist.
“We’re gonna get on the lift now. You can just kinda drag your tube behind you on the way up, okay?”
“How do I get on the lift?”
She pointed to a black belt slowly moving up the mountain. “It’s kinda like an escalator with no stairs. Just step on. Follow me.”
She boarded the lift and I followed. At the top of the mountain, I followed Melinda to a center lane and she showed me how to sit in my tube. Then she moved to the lane beside me.
Before we left, she took her strap from her wrist and tossed it to me. “Here. Hang on to this and we can go down together.”
I held it tight as we pushed off.
Tubing was more exhilarating than I could have imagined. We didn’t go straight downhill. There were bumps. There were dips. The tube slid from side to side within the lane. Before I knew it, we were slowing down at the bottom.
I jumped out of my tube, feeling more alive than I had in a while. “Wow! That was sick. Let’s go again!” I was nearly bouncing with excitement.
Our passes were only good for two hours, and I wanted to get every second’s worth. I raced back to the lift.
I didn’t need to hold Melinda’s leash anymore. I wasn’t scared. As a result, she ended up turning backwards on our next run. I was a little in front of her, so I didn’t notice until we had reached the bottom.
The third time down, I ended up backwards before the first bump. It was even more exhilarating because I had no idea what was coming next. I spent the fourth run figuring out how to do it on purpose, finally succeeding about a third of the way down my fifth run. I spent the rest of the two hours tubing backwards.
The lodge was a little more crowded when we were done tubing. The ski mountain was started to have a little more life as well.
We went back to where we had sat before, where Melinda had left her soft cooler lying. Apparently, it is normal to leave your belongings lying around a ski lodge. I had worried someone would move it or put it in lost and found, but it was exactly where we had left it.
Melinda sat beside me and texted her mother while I emptied the contents of the cooler. She explained her mother was at a nearby mall and would get us in about an hour.
We made peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. After two, I was still hungry. I didn’t say anything, but there must have been something in my expression because Melinda started giggling as she leaned against me slightly.
“Go ahead. I don’t mind.”
“But, I don’t want to turn into my brother.”
“Tubing is a physical activity. You’ve got to replace the calories you just burned.”
“You only had two.”
“I normally don’t eat two. I’ve seen you eat, Pat. Have another sandwich. I promise not to tell Walter.”
As I ate the third sandwich, Melinda told me about how she used to come here with her friends. Then, we talked about how her friends had changed once they started high school.
I felt bad that I couldn’t relate. I had never let anyone get close to me until Hartfield. But, Melinda just seemed to be looking for someone to share her story, not her emotions.
We talked a little about one of my best friends at school, Zach. Then we talked a little about going back to school.
People started coming off the mountain and the lodge was getting a little more crowded. I saw people starting to stare in our direction.
“Can we go somewhere less conspicuous?” I asked as I started packing the picnic back into the cooler.
Melinda looked around. “Yeah, sure. I have an idea.”
We took the cooler and went out a glass door towards the slopes. Melinda backtracked slightly until we were in a small area away from both the lodge and the slopes. A fire pit had been constructed with Adirondack chairs surrounding it.
I sat in one of the chairs, pulling Melinda into my lap. We kissed for a long time, unfazed by the cold, until she thought we should go wait for her mother.

“How was it?” Melinda’s mother asked as she pulled away from the drop off circle.
I smiled. “It was a lot of fun. I’ve never gone tubing before. Thanks for driving me, Mrs. Luzzelli.”
Melinda’s mother smiled. “I’m glad you had fun. Are you going straight home, or were you planning on staying for a while? Either is fine with me.”
I turned to Melinda, sitting beside me in the backseat. “Did you finish that puzzle without me?”
When she shook her head, I turned my attention back to her mother. “I guess that means I’m staying for a little while.”

I placed the last piece into the jigsaw puzzle and stood back to examine my work. The picture displayed three kittens sitting on yarn balls of various colors in a large woven basket.
“It’s cute. It’s a shame we worked so hard and now we have to put it back in the box.”
Melinda went to the closet. “Why?”
“Because we worked so hard on it.” Wasn’t she listening?
“No, I mean, why take it apart?” She returned to the table with a bottle of glue.
“What’s that for?”
“You’ve never glued a puzzle?”
No, because I hadn’t done puzzles since I was little. I had no idea what she meant. I just stared at her.
“We always do this. Look around. All the pictures on the walls are puzzles.”
I did as she said, noticing for the first time that all the artwork on the walls were indeed puzzles of various shapes and sizes. While I was admiring all the framed puzzles, Melinda dumped the glue on top of the one we had just completed, then massaged it between the pieces.
“Aren’t you gonna help me?”
No. It looked squishy and gross. I didn’t want to touch it. I tried to respond as nonchalantly as possible. “And get that all over my fingers?’
Melinda smiled mischievously, then reached for me with her glue-covered hands. I leapt out of her way. I expected her to follow me, but she went back to gluing the puzzle.
I stood beside her, watching over her shoulder before deciding to help. It didn’t take too long and, despite our hands being covered in glue, wasn’t quite as icky as I thought it would be.
When we could no longer see the cats and yarn through the white film, Melinda stood back to admire our handiwork.
“See? Now it’ll dry clear.”
“That’s pretty cool. I may have to start doing this at home.” I meant it, too. Doing the puzzle had been a lot more fun and way more relaxing than I had anticipated. “Now what?”
Melinda led me down the hall. “Well, first we have to wash our hands. We have a little time, but you have to leave by five.”
I couldn’t help but tease her as she entered a bedroom. Since it had a lot of pink and purple, I was pretty sure it was hers.
“Why? Is your other boyfriend coming over?”
“Yes. His name is Eric and my parents like him better than you.”
Melinda turned around. I could tell she was waiting for my response to her joke. (I’m pretty sure it had been a joke.)
Instead, I pointed to the bed. “Is this your bedroom?”
“Yeah. My bathroom’s right here.” Melinda pointed towards a door on the opposite side of the room.
“I can’t go in there.”
“Huh?” Her bafflement was adorable. “Oh. Right. I forgot. Hang on.” Melinda left the bathroom door open as she washed her hands. Then, she came to stand beside me in the doorway.
“There. I think you can go wash your hands, if I stand here.” As I crossed the room, she called after me, “So, what do you want to do now?”
I wasn’t sure if soap would make it harder to get the glue off, but since there were still bubbles in the sink from Melinda, I decided to try it as I answered her. “I have no idea. WTTE?”
“How about cards?”
I made a face into the mirror, but I was pretty sure she couldn’t see me. I waited until I was beside her before responding. “I can play solitaire.”
I followed her back to the study, where Melinda took two decks of cards from a box in the closet. “How about double solitaire?” Melinda suggested as she sat on the floor.
“That’s a game?” I sat on the floor across from her and watched her shuffle. It was different than the normal way. There was something about it that was familiar.
“Mom and Dad had a casino party once.” My eyes were fixed on her hands. “They hired actual dealers from real casinos. They shuffled the cards like that, at the corners. Are you a card shark?”
Melinda giggled. “My grandfather loves playing cards. He taught me when I was seven. I could shuffle better than him by the time I started middle school.”
“You are a card shark! I don’t wanna play with you.”
“It’s only solitaire. Watch.” She handed me the deck of red cards.
I copied Melinda as we laid out cards in front of ourselves and created playing slots. She explained how to play our personal space and the shared space. After she explained the scoring, we played the first round.
I picked up my pile in my left hand and prepared my right to flip the first cards when Melinda gave the signal.
She beat me, forty to twenty in the first round, but I was a fast learner and I reached a hundred points in the third round, while she still had eighty-nine.
We separated the decks and she said she would teach me to play War. She then described the game I played with my roommate.
“Wait. I know this game. This is the game I play with Frank.”
“I thought you said you only play solitaire.”
“Well, I didn’t know the name of this game. He calls it something else. Jung-Jang, I think. His grandfather taught him. One of his grandfathers speaks Korean, the other one Chinese. I’m not sure which one taught him the game.”
Melinda smiled as she picked up her stack and we began flipping the cards. I won the first game and she won the second. We had just separated the stacks for a tiebreaker round when her other boyfriend arrived.

“Melinda!” Her mother called up the stairs a few moments after we heard the doorbell sound. “Your ride is here.”
Oh man! I had lost all track of time. I kept my voice low as Melinda packed the cards away.
“I didn’t get to say goodbye.”
She turned and put her arms around my neck. “I’ll see you Sunday. I’ll try to get back to campus early.” Our kiss was interrupted by a knock on the door.
Melinda’s roommate was standing just over the threshold with a knowing smile. “Sorry.”
Her miniature clone peered around her into the room. I had met her once before, so I knew she wasn’t about to turn into a screaming fan. She started waving at Melinda, but when she saw me, she started signing frantically.
Although I had learned American Sign Language for my last film, I was not able to follow Crystal when she got excited. I missed a lot of what she was asking, but I got the impression she wanted to know why I was there and if Melinda was my girlfriend.
I laughed, speaking aloud as I signed. “Slow down! Melinda will tell you all about it later. I better get home. Hi, Sarah. Bye, Sarah!”
I smiled at Melinda’s roommate, kissed the top of Melinda’s head quickly, then started out of the room, the three girls in tow. As I got in my car, I saw Melinda wave one last time before shutting the door.

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[Table Of Contents] [Chapter 4, part 2]
Want to read more about Walter and Melinda? Check out Boarding School Break: Happy Thanksgiving - Chapter 6: Tubing

Levi was finally home for Thanksgiving break. He hadn’t seen his family in three months, since he returned to school on the other side of the country, so was desperate to spend one-on-one time with each of them.
FaceTime was cool, and chatting on the phone was fine, but neither afforded the same solace of knowing with certainty that you are alone with someone. Anyone could walk past or be just out of frame when communicating virtually. Now that Levi was home, he could have conversations in which he could see body language, read silences, and listen for footsteps or creaking floorboards in adjacent rooms.
There are also certain topics it’s just easier to discuss in person. For that, Levi was exceedingly grateful, because, for the most part, they were topics he had no interest in. Things like his parents bothering him about career plans after he graduates and where he’ll live, or his brothers asking about his girlfriend Stella and whether or not she spends the night at his place. All kinds of things he’d rather be left unsaid.
But Levi was the oldest of five brothers, and like it or not, his siblings had a laundry list of burning questions for him that they rarely had the opportunity to launch into on the phone. He was the oldest by a wide margin, all the others were still in grade school.
The youngest, Kyle, was only five. The second youngest, Silas, just seven. The second oldest, Tyson, was growing into his own at ten years old, but still firmly planted in childhood’s soil. Reese was twelve, almost thirteen years old, so the oldest, and straddling the line somewhere between boy and man. Reese looked up to Levi like he was the sky.
Reese was the only one of the boys with his own cellphone, so the only one privileged to daily conversations with their brother. Levi made a point to call him every single day after he moved away. The first time they had a big fight and Reese stopped picking up his calls, Levi texted threatening to fly home to reconcile with him. Due to the age discrepancy, Levi served as somewhat of a second father figure for the boys, even though he was still a boy himself in more ways than one.
Ironically, despite having two dads, Levi grew up without much of a male presence. His biological father was absent, and his stepfather was deeply troubled. This left him simultaneously unprepared and unshakably determined to be a healthy role model for his brothers, ending that cycle in its tracks. He knew what he didn’t know, but he figured these kids were better off taking advice from a good guy guessing his way through life than a bad guy who knew what he was doing.
As he settled in from the flight home that holiday, he could already see piles of food in iridescent disposable containers piled high on every available surface in the kitchen. “Great, I’m starving!” He rejoiced as he reached for a platter of warm turkey legs. “Hey, hey, leave it. This is all for the church.” Helen, the boys’ mother, chided, swatting his hand away. “I’m cooking ours up tomorrow.”
Levi sighed and resigned himself to some cold leftover franks and beans in the fridge as he eyed the abundant piles of Thanksgiving fixings with envy. But, as he reminded himself it was for the homeless, he recalibrated his jealousy to an appropriate level.
He wondered where Reese was. He’d been home since late last night and barely seen him. Usually his brothers shadowed him from the moment he walked in the door, right up until he walked back into the airport, ever since he started spending most of the year away at school.
With his mom busy cooking and his brothers nowhere to be found, he headed back upstairs to call his girlfriend Stella and find out about how her trip home was going.
He didn’t make it more than two paces up the stairs before he heard Matt, his stepdad, screaming for him from two beers deep at eleven in the morning: “Lee! Get down here. Need you.” He was reluctant to indulge the request, but instinct told him it wasn’t really a request.
He dragged himself to the den and nodded, trying to look unassuming. “Where’s Reese?” Matt demanded, not taking his eyes away from the TV. “Don’t know,” Levi replied, figuring the less he said the less could be used against him. “Reeeeeeeeeese!” Matt hollered from his chair. Silence. “Reeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeese?!” Matt bellowed again, opening a third can. Silence.
“Guess he’s out.” Levi reasoned. “Well, when he gets back, the two of you come in here.” Matt directed. “Yes Sir.” Levi reassured him, dipping out as fast as he could manage. He turned back towards the kitchen. “Hey, Mom, where’s Kyle, Silas and Tyson?” “Playing at the neighbors, I think. Why, you want me to get them—” “No, no.” Levi cut her off, relieved everyone was out until Matt’s mood passed. He left Helen to do her cooking and crept back up the stairs to try Stella again.
As he passed Reese’s bedroom, he saw him sprawled out on the floor with a comic book. “Hey!” Levi exclaimed, standing in the doorframe. “What?” Reese asked, not looking up either. “Didn’t you hear Dad calling you from downstairs?” “Yah.” Reese said, turning a page.
“If Dad knew you were here that whole time, he’d whoop you.” Levi reminded him. Reese closed the comic and looked him the eye. “Well then he better not find out I was here, right?” Reese replied, raising an eyebrow as he tried to discern whether Levi was warning or threatening him.
“Yah, damn straight. We should get out of here for a couple hours. At least.” Levi cautioned. Reese shoved a couple things in his pockets and followed Levi carefully down the stairs. Reese dashed through the front door without a coat, so Levi risked discovery to return and grab him one. The Montana November had been pleasantly forgiving, rarely dropping past the low 50s, but it still required a layer of protection to be pleasant.
They pulled their coats closer and crunched the carpet of dead leaves underneath their feet as they made their way down the back-access road. Nobody ever went down that way, and cars couldn’t drive on it, so they’d retain their head start no matter what. The brothers walked to the tune of their own thoughts for somewhere between fifteen and thirty minutes before Levi finally pierced the silence.
“Hey, so, look. I know it’s been a hard time back here with Dad losing his job and everything. So I just want you to know it’s ok to still have your own problems and priorities that have nothing to do with that. Just because there’s something big going on in everyone’s life doesn’t mean the small things going on in your life don’t matter.”
Reese kicked a stone a few paces down the road as he digested this, before finally returning, “I miss when we just talked about sports and whatever was on TV.”
Levi sighed and shoved his hands in his pockets, bracing against a gust of wind. “You were younger then. You notice more now. You’re older and more mature and we can be more direct about things. We have to be.” Levi said this with familial drama in mind. Things like their parents’ marriage, the family’s financial situation, and the burden Reese was now facing as the oldest child in the home. He wasn’t expecting what Reese said instead.
“Ok, then, uh… Can I ask you something about sex?” Levi almost tripped over his own feet. Not because he found the topic particularly awkward, he actually had no problem talking openly about sex to a certain extent, but because in his eyes this was a little boy who plays with trains and drinks juice from a straw. Not an adolescent young man with those questions.
Levi knew from his own childhood that due to his family’s religious persuasions and the state’s lack of public education budget, Reese would almost certainly get no sex ed. So, as rapidly as his head was still spinning, he said, “Sure. Ask away.” He just hoped he wasn’t coming off as nervous as he was. The last thing he wanted was to impart his hang-ups about sex onto anyone else.
“So, you’ve had a lot of sex, right? Like, you basically know everything there is to know?” Levi was about to laugh, but he caught himself, as it hit him that Reese was serious. Levi was a junior in college who’d just lost his virginity the previous summer, to his current girlfriend. He was flattered that anyone, let alone his brother, would ever think of him as someone who “basically knows everything” about sex. It was sweet, but also a striking condemnation of how little the poor kid truly understood.
Levi knew he should correct Reese and explain that, in the grand scheme of things, he was still pretty inexperienced. But he liked the idea of being the guy who “basically knows everything there is to know,” too much to speak up. “Yep, mhmm.” Levi nodded.
“Great.” Reese exhaled a sigh of relief. “So, ok, it’s basically…” Reese fiddled with the tails of his overshirt. “Bro, there’s nothing you’re going to say that’ll shock me.” Levi reassured him, without a hint of macho posturing. After all, he was almost a decade older. “Ok, so.. Just, like, I guess…” Reese turned towards the ground as his cheeks flared red.
Levi wanted to say more, but remembered being Reese’s age with enough clarity to understand that he could say the most by staying quiet. “I guess, just… Yah, I mean, you know, based on your experiences and everything… Is the stuff on the internet, like, how similar is it to the real thing, you know?”
Levi felt a constellation of mixed emotions wash over him as he was placed in a position of authority by being tasked with answering the question while simultaneously realizing he himself was desperately wondering the same thing under six months ago. He thought Reese’s question was so innocent, but too far ahead of his time, comparatively speaking. He liked being the cool and knowledgeable older brother who had the answer to this question, but was haunted by the reality that had it come just a bit sooner, he’d have been at a complete loss.
Levi had been through enough to learn that you can’t waste life worrying about what could have happened, though, so soldiered on with trying to orient himself around the question. “It’s—It depends what you mean. Are you getting up to a lot of that stuff online Squish?” Levi asked, consciously trying to exstinguish the judgement from his tone.
When his mom and Matt had brought Reese back from the hospital, Levi hated him. He was convinced that the addition of a baby would solidify the completion of a separate family his mother was starting without him. He was just seven years old. Reese became the embodiment of all his worst fears, and for a while, he projected everything onto him. For the first few weeks, Levi wouldn’t even look at the baby. His parents even considered enrolling him in counseling, something unheard of in their slice of rural Montana.
But then baby Reese had been given a helmet to shape parts of his skull that hadn’t finished developing in the womb. Or, as it was explained to Levi, protect the baby’s head because it was “still too squishy.” Levi had only gotten closer to Reese ever since, only getting closer still, twelve years later. Who could be threatened by something that needs a foam hat to keep it’s head on straight?
The affectionate nickname, though it’s use was organic, just made the question harder for Reese to answer. “Well. Not all the time. Sometimes. Just, you know. Joel had some on his phone so then we were all looking at it and then later I decided maybe I wanted to look at some by myself and… Yah.”
Reese was a terrible liar. Besides the fact that he had all the textbooks tells, he always clasped his hands behind his back whenever he was lying. Levi didn’t want to inadvertently pressure him into talking about things he’d rather keep to himself, but they’d never made a habit of lying to each other before, and he wasn’t going to see it normalized in their dynamic now. “Hey, what you do or don’t do isn’t my business, but if we’re going to talk about it then you’ve got to be straight with me.” Levi insisted, catching his eye.
Reese unclasped his hands. A good sign. “I do watch it, ok! Don’t tell anyone.” Reese blurted out. “I don’t know it’s just, it’s fun, it’s easy, there’s so much of it.” Reese looked away again. “Don’t be mad.” Levi was completely unsure of how to handle this situation. But, at least, he knew how not to handle it. The very few conversations he had been a part of in church or school were really more lectures than conversations and all made him feel like touching himself was the worst thing he could do, second only to asking questions about it.
He didn’t want anyone else to fall prey to that train of thought if he could help it. “I’m not mad bro, it’s natural, it’s not anything you need to apologize for.” Levi said, slower their pace a few steps as Reese’s nervousness had practically pushed them to a jog. “It’s not good for you though.” Levi clarified.
As the words passed through his lips, he could see Reese retreating into himself. “I mean—not that it’s bad for you.” Levi backtracked, drawing him back in. “It’s like potato chips,” he continued.” “They’re not good for you, but they’re not bad for you either as long as you don’t eat too many.” He searched Reese’s expression for any signs of receptivity; nothing. Levi was well into ‘guessing his way through’ territory. The only they’d covered about pornography in church sex-ed besides being a sin, was that it could make you go blind.
“Potato chips have some good things in them. Potatoes are a plant that grow in the ground. There are nutrients in potatoes. We need calories to get through the day. So they’re not bad for you just on their own, but like with anything, too much is too much you know?” Levi said, running out of steam with the metaphor. “No, not at all.” Reese replied, beating himself up internally for being unable to follow along.
“So, it’s not… you know, like… legit? It’s not what it’ll really be like when it happens?” Reese asked again, using up his remain bit of courage. “That really depends Squish.” Levi replied, trying to think of a different metaphor. He decided he was far enough into the potato chips that he had to stick with it. “If you asked me whether or not salt and vinegar chips tasted like salt and vinegar, I’d probably say yah. If you asked me whether or not chicken and waffles chips taste like chicken and waffles, I’d probably say no. You know?” He said, not even sure he knew what he meant anymore.
“Lee, I think you’re reaching here.” Reese said, gently. He realized he needed to drop the metaphors. “Ok, so, without a metaphor, the answer is I can’t tell you unless I know exactly the kind you’re watching and I shouldn’t know that. That’s no one’s business but your significant other if you choose to share that stuff together.” Reese stared blankly, but intently, back at him as they walked. Levi realized he needed to offer more of an answer than “I can’t answer.”
“What I can tell you is most of it is just total, complete, utter bullshit. About as real as real as any Hollywood movie. Like in Hollywood, yes casinos exist and yes the CIA is real, but anything that happens after that’s established is probably complete fiction. In porn, yah, pizzas really can get delivered and sorority girls really do live together, but just about everything that happens after those elements are introduced probably don’t happen in real life. Even when it’s just two people at home, no crazy backstories, it’s probably still just giving you completely wrong information.” He finished, satisfied with the veracity of everything he’d come up with.
Reese looked disappointed, but not surprised. “Yah. So, you’re saying I probably just shouldn’t want it then, huh?” Levi knew what his mom would want him to say and what the pastor would want him to say. But he was primarily concerned with what his twelve-year-old self would want him to say.
“That’s not what I’m saying. The most important relationship you’ll ever have is the one you have with yourself. That extends to all areas of your life, including your sex life. So, it really is just like potato chips.” “Levi can we stop with the metaphors,” Reese begged. “Trust me on this,” Levi said, thinking he’d managed to tie it all together pretty nicely, for someone improvising from scratch.
“If you’re watching it as part of a healthy sex life that involves dating and fantasies about regular girls, it’s a good thing. Yo, between you and me, it’s maybe the single greatest creation in the history of mankind. But if watching it is taking the place of pursuing actual girls you like and developing feelings for people in your real world, then it’s taking more from you than it’s giving. Some isn’t bad for you, some is fine. Too much isn’t. Ok?” Reese nodded.
They’d been so lost in conversation they’d managed to walk the whole loop and get within an eighth of a mile of the house again. “Thanks, Levi.” Reese said, without having to search for words for the first time since the topic arose. “Anytime. Seriously, Reese. Please come to me, your real, human, brother, before your idiot friends or Google, if you have questions about this stuff. Not because I know everything about anything. I really don’t know much about this stuff. But because I know a lot about you, where you’re at, where you’re coming from. And because I won’t sell your data to Russia.” Levi winked, grinning.
As Reese charged towards the house, Levi watched him and thought, with a mix of melancholy and pride, about how quickly Reese was growing up. He wondered if that meant he was aging just as quickly? The thought spooked him, and he put it out of his mind.
Levi held the door open for Reese and as they bounded up the back steps. He found the younger boys waiting for Helen to finish cooking so she could fix them a snack, and he jumped in to help expedite things. Reese drifted upstairs to be on his own.
He would spend the rest of the break wondering how he’d ever be able to tell Levi what a great role model he was, or how much his advice helped. Meanwhile, Levi would spend the rest of the break wondering how he would ever tell Reese how much he appreciated being trusted with these sorts of questions and wondering whether or not his advice helped.
Neither would ever find the words. Neither would ever really need them. Any time Reese returned with another question, and Levi responded with another answer, they knew.

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